THE WEAKEST LINK
Entry posted by Roxanne Wilde
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sz0m5pWUTfU
I love chain mail. These emails give me the chance to release that 'dark, tortured soul' I'm renowned for having. 
Finish The Sentence Survey:
1. My ex... will one day appear on Foxtel's "Cheaters" ... Or "Cops"... Hopefully, both will occur concurrently, with their respective film crews high fiving each other in the background.
Now THAT'S reality TV worth watching! 
2. Maybe I should... start doing what the voices in my head tell me to do... 
3. I love... my kids & animals. Adults are mean.
4. People would say that... I spend too much time chasing shitty men & unavailable women.
5. I don't understand why people... can't just get on with it?
6. When I wake up in the morning... I think "here we go again"...
7. I lost ... my faith in justice a long time ago. I now believe in only two things - a loaded Smith & Wesson, & my barrister.
* fires gun overhead in random display of madness *
8. Life is full of... debt, broken promises & shitty men.
9. My past is... full of debt, broken promises & shitty men.
10. I get annoyed... everytime I open my front door - so many assholes... So few bullets. 
11. Parties are... just like wedding receptions, wakes & Jerry Springer - humanity at its most compellingly tragic.
12. I wish... that someone would shoot Paris Hilton. In the name of good taste, where is Lee Harvey Oswald when you need him???
13. Dogs... shit on your lawn, chew up the paper & maul the elderly.
Why would I need that, when I've already got kids? 
14. Cats... always end up playing Judas to my Jesus. They can't WAIT to sell me down the river.
15. Tomorrow... has yet to be dealt with. 
16. I have a low tolerance... for stupid people. Hence, everyday is a struggle.
17. If I had a million dollars.. I'd do a Harold Holt. 
18. I'm totally terrified.. of monkeys. They're evil spirits in cute costumes. 
19. My spouse... is a term used by people who want to be single. 
20. My life... is a sleigh ride to hell, but it's jingle bells all the way, baby!!! 
*laughing maniacally*
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