After being in this industry in and out for a good few years now I think it's time for me to discuss my thoughts on this comment that I get a lot when discussing this style of work with my civvie friends who know what I do, or even other sex industry professionals.
"Men who pay for sex can't get it for free"
I've certainly heard this line often and I suppose before I was familiar with the ins and outs of SW I may have had this thought too. Of course now I've worked on and off for 3 years FS I am much more educated on what truly does make a sex work client. Whilst I can't deny, I'm sure we do get the odd person who finds unpaid sex difficult to achieve this is actually far less common than you would think
There seems to be this misconception that the standard sex work client is a sex deprived weirdo, absolute creeps none of us would want to talk to in real life but in reality our clients can be anyone, there really is nothing that sets a sex work client apart from civvie dudes except perhaps his lens for how he views this world.
In my time working both private and now in an establishment I've seen people from all walks of life be it Tradies or high up businessmen. Doctors, solicitors, students, small business owners, IT dudes, financial advisors, supermarket employees, massage therapists, gym instructors, guys on centrelink, uncles, fathers, grandfathers, lesbians, virgin's, couples looking to explore, people with high body counts and those with very few.
The reality is anyone can be a punter, the box people try to fit them into is based on projection, insecurities and stigma of the people making that very box. Clients are people from all walks of life, income levels, education and social classes. The same goes for the workers doing this job, we are everywhere and we are everyone, again it is our societal lens that is truly different.
Now for the reason I believe punters truly are attracted to paying for a service in this industry.
1. People pay for the same reason someone has a playsation plus subscription. Sure you might already have access to a bunch of games, but with your plus subscription you might get special offers, access to things you might not normally find, VIP treatment and the feeling of being in a special club.
2. Participation in this industry is exciting, it's exhilarating and it's a thrill. For some people the excitement of doing something left of centre or frowned upon by normies is straight up kinky. Sometimes the adrenaline rush alone and fantasy in someone's head might be just as good as the actual experience. People seek this feeling out in all sorts of things, paid sex is just one of those options.
3. Some guys (and girls or whatever you identify as) simply just like a good slutty fuck. Wholesome and family friendly might be nice for a long term commitment but there's something about straight up just fun and sexy sex. People do this all the time on dating apps, quite literally for FREE. Which brings me to my next point..
4. Some dudes looking to get laid are experienced enough to realise that they will likely have to spend more time money and energy into a tinder fuck when sex isn't even a guarantee. They might have to cover her ubers, shout a nice dinner or a sesh and then still spend hours with someone before she decides she wants to get down and dirty. Or it simply might not end up happening at all, after all civvie women are not employees of sex work and when they do choose to fuck someone in a casual capacity that is a volunteer position for them. Not all volunteers enjoy unpaid work and not many women see dinner a sesh and/or ubers covered as a reasonable reiumbursement for their time and bodies.
5. Following on from my last point, most women on dating apps are looking for just that. Dating - a literal committed relationship. With sex work there is no commitment, there is no uncertainty. Men know that all women have a price but ours are laid out simply and you know our conditions. For some punters it is simply the comfort of knowing they aren't going to hurt a woman by leading them on, they aren't going to get hurt themselves or they aren't going to be confused. Some men might not be ready to commit to a ring and a relationship but can part with a few hundred dollars for what they're looking for in that time.
At the end of the day its almost as if sex work and those working in it are playing a real life video game. It is fun, it's sexy and you can experience it in real time. Punters are the players and the workers are the characters they're choosing to play. Some men have their favourites but most people wanna try playing everyone at least once.
Who doesn't enjoy video games?