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Miss Honey Analverkehr's Blog

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Some of the funny momments I have being a diverse provider

Miss Honey Analverkehr


I'm a girl of many talents, or a less glamous way to put it -an all rounder.


My sweet and bubbly nature means I enjoy GFE, cuddles and chats and getting to know people from all walks of life with experiences other than my own.


But being a kinky girl I also love helping people explore their kinks, especially extreme ones that they've always dreamed of trying but never found a girl willing to do that with them.


Having done training under some of Melbourne's most respected kinksters has instilled in me a fastidiousness for cleanliness around sex and kink. Clean clean CLEAN. An awareness of how far body fluids unseen by the human eye can travel and what it TRULY takes to clean up after play.


I have a collection of chemicals I order in especially that are the exact ones used in hospitals, some of which are specifically designed for body fluids and I'm cleaning every surface after bookings.


Which brings to to funny situations like the other day.


I had a regular want to be a squeezed in for a quickie (and I do like to look after my regulars) so I'm up front I'd be squeezing him in and not able to give the usual focussed on him experience I like to provide.


This led to the situation where hes in the shower afterwards and I'm already cleaning the bathroom going 'dont come back on this side of the bathroom -the chemical takes 10mins to work and I dont have time to wait 10mins twice!'


He noticed the chemical and said 'that's good stuff -thats the same stuff we use in the hospital I work at'

I can't help but laugh good naturedly, did he think I was talking crap when he'd asked me about my cleanliness previously? I'm aware his profession makes him takes the risk of infections seriously -my profession makes me take the risk of infections seriously too!


I've guitlyly rushed him out the door reminding him I had a client coming for a massage next -I needed to change the look and feel of the room to suit the totally different booking. He walked out the door saying it mystified him why a person would book a massage with me when there was SO much else they could do with me. Where as I thought, who WOULDN'T like a massage -massages are great!


But I LOVE the variety between my nice bookings and my kink bookings -its part of what keeps my work fun and always fresh.


This week I even had a longtime fetlife fan book me saying 'I loved you ever since I saw your vid with the tennis ball'.

So a request for my ball trick meant I had balls handy when I came out of a booking and my coworker burst out laughing at me -she said I looked like a clown I had red lipstick smeared that far over my face!

Well this clown happens to learn circus and acrobatics for her hobby, so then I chased around my coworker with that face juggling the balls, hiding and jumping out at her to scare her. (Hehe why do people not like clowns? I cant help but stir!)


From me riding my toy unicorn I have for my lil girl roleplays around the place naked, to helping my coworker rope her boobs and insert butt plugs on the kitchen bench (as you do!), being such a varied provider means lots of funny random behind the scenes moments because there are always the most random things on hand!


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Wow ... what an interesting life you have... and with an equally intersting co-worker. You girls must rock...!

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Why do people not like clowns?  What is currently showing at the cinema isn't going to help! :)

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Why do people not like clowns?  What is currently showing at the cinema isn't going to help! :)



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