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Social Media

Forgotten

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I love Twitter. It’s instant. I can express myself. I can expose my own stupidity, assist others and get assisted. I get admiration and a confidence boost. I know a lot of men and ladies enjoy my social media; even my family overseas occasionally read it (to make sure I’m not dead, apparently) but the boundaries must be defined and redefined.

 

Before iPhones had the ability to block numbers it would be frustrating to receive messages from men (punters) who were constant pests. There was nothing as an independent business person you could do. Occasionally I would give the threat "I will publish your number online if you don’t stop harassing me”, which would generally stop them but sometimes you would have to go through with the threat (all numbers would be removed as soon as the punter knew I wasn’t joking and he would retract his behavior).

 

Now with the block function messages can be permanently blocked but there is still the temptation to expose bad/dangerous behavior or even good behavior.

 

However what industry acts like this and gets away with it? Most companies have social media guidelines in how they represent the company directly or indirectly. Sex workers are our own bosses, the rules are non-existent because we are in an industry that is either illegal/criminalized/not respected/not accountable/immoral/stigma/etc.

 

The sex industry is built on discretion. It’s not my style to post pictures of gifts, talk about how amazing a punter is, tell the Internet world how ‘busy’ I am, and live tweet bookings. I expect the same in return. This is because I don’t want anyone knowing my movements. I shouldn’t be producing any photographic proof of my movements. I also don’t want to encourage any behavior where a punter feels like he should have to bring me a gift, or a competition between the best gifts as it could breed jealousy or a sense of competition.

 

The fee required for the booking is all you need to bring and of course repeat business is the best gift you could ever give a sex worker. Knowing that you had a great time and wish to repeat the experience breeds a sense of pride and accomplishment. What happens in a bedroom stays between us – which is why I don’t understand why people write reviews!

 

I have no issue with posting information online about rogue clients – but I also don’t take it lightly and the positives must out weight the negatives. It is a deterrent and also lets other punters know what behavior isn’t acceptable.

 

Arriving late to a booking, a no show, not following booking etiquette isn’t a reason to make punters identity known. However refusing to pay, pushing for unsafe sex and threats are behavior that shouldn’t be tolerated. There are of course Facebook groups, forums, emails etc where women share this information.

 

Other sex workers don’t think it's wise to post details of rogue clients because they might change their number or do revenge attacks. Rogue punters are not stupid and they know sex workers have ways to share information. Not all sex workers are part of these groups – I had ask to be invited. Lots of rogue punters also don’t have access to Twitter accounts.

 

There is no absolute wrong or right in any situation – but don’t treat rogue punters as stupid. They buy disposable SIM cards and can’t be traced. All sex workers can do is be vigilant. I am however aware I am in a state where sex workers mostly do outcalls to hotels so I am not inviting anyone into my home. As a legal, registered, tax paying sex worker who has nothing to hide from my family, I have nothing to fear about going to the police or exposing your illegal or dangerous behaviour.

 

Of course there are times when I deflect bad behaviour by making a joke. One guy asked me to take coke with him all week, so I made a joke that I was only interested in real coke, not the coke with Stevia or diet coke. Haha! Or when you get random messages like "hi" I will reply with a random quote from the bible (would you expect anything else from a former catholic school girl!).

 

I hate having to talk about rogue punters, 99.9% of punters are wonderful and you cause no threat to my peers or me. It can paint the industry in a bad picture and perhaps turn off some punters. However it helps to write about topics and produced a balanced viewpoint that makes me accountable for my actions.

 

Hope you enjoyed reading and would love to hear your comments.



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"What happens in a bedroom stays between us – which is why I don’t understand why people write reviews!"

 

This is how I feel. I'm personally not comfortable with the idea of writing a review because I find the time spent between two (or more lol) people in an intimate and sexual nature is a personal between those people and it's not something that can be graded with a score out of 10 or a performance review where the WL needs to perform better next time.

 

The other reason is because no two people will go in to a booking with the exact same desires, expectations and emotion as another so "YMMV" is in full effect. I've had bookings with WL's where if I wrote down a review of our experiences together some people might read it and think that she is a poor WL because we didn't do all of these crazy things and didn't have non-stop sex for a long time but I had the most wonderful time because she was able to cater to a certain level of expectation and desire

 

"It’s not my style to post pictures of gifts, talk about how amazing a punter is, tell the Internet world how ‘busy’ I am, and live tweet bookings. I expect the same in return."

 

It seems that for some WL's out there they feel the need to portray a certain reputation or persona about their WL "character" for lack of a better term, and the live updates of gifts and movements etc enhances that. Well, that's how one WL explained it to me anyway. I personally don't have a problem with it but it is also not my style either. I do find it incredibly cringeworthy to see the clients broadcast "I'm about to go and fuck @ (insert WL twitter name here)" out on twitter. I don't see the point in that.

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The unfortunate thing is it's that 0.01% that give us all a bad name. As a punter I am rather anal about my privacy. The twitter account which I follow you with is my punting only one. I've been doing it long enough to know the rules.

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An interesting read Emma thanks. I'm barely on Twitter as I find it a bit too much like mouse flatulence.

 

Obviously I think writing sex reviews is a worthwhile exercise for several reasons, although there are some reviews on the Interwub that make even me blush or cringe. Saying what happens on the tour stays on tour etc doesn't help a guy decide where to spend a months worth of his disposable income IMO.

 

I used to be anti-gift, until one special lady let me into her life a bit and it stopped being just business. From the on I realised that well chosen gifts play a similar role to well chosen words or good manners – gifts don't create a binding contract between the parties, more of an 'intention to behave honourably and respectfully towards one and other'.

 

I have no advice to offer about rogue punters at all, but I strongly wish they didn't exist to spoil it for the rest of us.

 

Cheers

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Blakes- a lady has a website and states her services. If the customer got what he wanted what more do you need to know?

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It is like hotels and restaurants, you most often get what it's advertised (and when you don't, or there was a communication problem, or misguided expectations, it's that negative comments start). But even when you get what's advertised, there are so many ways of getting "the same" (which is never quite the same), that reviews help as people reading try to tailor the offer to their expectations and vice versa. I'm sure you use reviews when booking a hotel, and many other things.

 

Granted, sex work, is a bit different to other services, but the more normal and less stigmatised you want it to be, the more it will come closer to any other services, where reviews play an increasingly bigger part. (I don't book a room at Booking.com without going through dozens of reviews)

 

Talking about escort reviews exclusively, as it's such an intimate kind of service, the fact of writing a review, is what in part stops me from calling a girl I saw two days later and invite her out to the cinema. It helps us to get over the personal experience too, put things in perspective (the girl is available to whoever she wishes to see, not just to us). If you wish there's a lot of catharsis in writing reviews beyond the basic purpose of recommending or not recommending to others.

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I'm doing another blog post about this... I think ts unfair that people missed what the thread is about... Social media

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Sorry, I only replied about reviews because you asked (and I posted a blog here). Social media, I'd need the time I don't have now to see where I really stand about it. Not overly impressed at first sight with some aspects of it but it would require more analysis, and probably not being AndyJ (a luxury I have on Facebook occasionally, but not on Twitter... actually I have no interest of using Twitter other than for the business).

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Aaliyah Dell'Aqua

Posted

Great read thank you Emma.

 

Definitely going to implement your creative response to the 'hi' messages :)

 

It astounds me that even in my profile I clearly state the information required from a text and "Please refrain from sending me a lazy message such as 'hi', because I'll be too lazy to respond!

 

Have been contemplating a twitter account although I'll continue working on my upcoming website I think firstly. Xo

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Emma, I started reading your post and in my head I was saying to each paragraph "yip, yes, totally, absolutely, yes, yip, for sure, emphatically!

 

You give a beautifully fair account, and seem to have a very balanced way of deflecting the negative too. No easy feat as we are only one yet expected to behave similarly to a MNC! I can't and won't claim to be an expert, I've dabbled in this bubble of fun for about 11 months, and have been away for almost twice that time again since, but reading your post really hit a chord with me,. And to my absolute joy, you've reminded me that there are some wondrously smart cookies out there!! :)

 

It would be my pleasure to make your acquaintance one day. Thank you for a truly great post :)

\Alana x

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If I was Emma. I'd just ignore rogue clients - blocking them is so much easier these days with the new phones. Just a simple tap and you don't hear from them anymore.

 

I wouldn't engage in any chitchat or jokes with clients who want to do drugs or stupid stuff.

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